It has been a strange few days.. Low's leveled a few... I want to spend some time together although he seems so busy...

I have also found my Daughter.. Summer.

Im Waiting. Waiting for you. Waiting. Thats all I'll ever do.

Lonely. Unloved.

Here I am yet again, sat in milltown center. Not going to move, Blessing, Drinking, A little talking is all I will do.

Can't find myself to farm.

Here I am at lvl 52... just last night I got to 100% so almost 53.. just waiting for Low!

I said about a month or so ago that I WOULDN'T pass level 51.. but that changed...

I want to get to level 53 so... I can get the demonblood and new armour... and a lighter pouch. which then I will need to farm

..I find myself farming more than usual.. with more plat lost from my purse, although it makes me lighter, I'll need it for the next 10 levels ahead of me which I really don't think I'll get there anytime soon. I'm just to weak.

Im not here to Argue or to Take sides. Im just myself, and I want to be myself for thats whom I know. Nobody can change the way I think... It's not my fault, I couldn't stand it no more.. it is the past.

I need to level just once more... just.. once....
I can't bring myself to do it, I just don't have the time.

Im lost ... No shell to keep me from the danger I face..

**trembles** I cnat witre strigaht ...

But then it all changed.. I felt lighter... My love had come home.

The sweet bitter end. The things that you don't want to go wrong.

"Never shall I take the same path again. Never shall I make another mistake, that I once did before. Never shall I.. " Is that all it is? Never this Never that. No wonder I don't get anywhere. I make mistakes like everybody else, it's just everybody else that fails to see me move on.

I spent a few nights with Low we sat together, after he'd trained enough.

Confusion.

Today, like any other day.. I get confused at the easiest things to understand.

"What is life, when we live to die but die to live" ... I mean what does that mean?

Some sort of afterlife? Like for the Zombies that I kill without fear anymore?

"I miss you... I need you... Come to me... " .. Those words appeared more frequent in my dreams as of late.

I myself have found a new love... His names Lowrenzo.

I'm alright. Really, I am.

Ushiba's happy. He's with his lover, Hope. So... That has turned out well for him.

I'm moving on.. too. I think so anyway.